Wednesday, August 30, 2006
hahax.. booking in lohx.. the long break is over.. hahax.. went NUS today.. feel like a uni student le.. not badx.. especially the textbook si hua is using for her organic.. not badx.. veri chim.. interesting too.. dunno that hybridisation also for O, C, N.. and the resonance effect.. still not good in that lehx.. haax...onli study for 1 hr.. nice nice.. but scared i handle them in the future.. hahax.. hmmm.. think gonna pay up for uni melb end of the year los.. then super confirm going le.. no turning back after you pay the fees you know.. my mum was like telling me you better know your purpose to go there well both in the morn and evening los.. haax.. was thinking about it too.. must not go there cox of her and stuff.. actualli i kinda even more sure im going not cox of her due to her blog las.. haix.. i was like erm.. go to her feb entry this afternoon.. got thank you hubba for giving me a large bouquet of flowers and muacks muacks love you a lot.. then go to the augest entry then say i was irritating her.. hmmm.. kinda a large diff man.. lolx.. oh well.. its over le las.. i also dunno how should i pray for her these days.. lost of purpose.. hmmm.. think gotta go think think about it bahx.. must be super sure not cox of her.. haax.. then that si hua tell me say her that friend interested in me??? omg.. rare occation man.. wads today's date.. hahax.. realli los.. gonna bring mp3 and all the new guitar tabs in camp to learn guitar with the others together.. hahax.. think it will be fun.. but mp3 is a banned item.. hope dun get caught.. caught equels to "chiam" (sign extra or confinement) hahax.. hope not so suai las.. but need the mp3 for the song mahx.. must know how it sounds like to play ritex.. hahax.. okie gotta sign off le.. shower and book in.. siansation.. hahax..
[Zen] believed today at 7:36 PM
haix read more into her blog.. got nothing to do.. wan to make myself more sad onli.. wahahax.. enjoy it.. saddist towards myself ritex.. jux that i dun like physical pain.. jux emotional will do.. wahahax.. if nottttt... dun say las.. hmmm.. she talked about her friend breaking up las.. then got me in it.. she said something like mayb a peaceful and happi relationship wun last.. cox pple tend to forget and reject things that are already there for you.. she quarrelled with her mani times las.. it will make both parties feel the hurt without each other.. but for me and her i think onli once and is a small quarrel las.. last for less than half a day.. o0 haix.. true true.. pple are like wad my father say.. xia zian.. hahax.. strong word eh.. father always use it to describe human behavior.. lolx.. haix.. thing i somehow affected her life.. super lots las.. dun say las.. sianx.. jux pure sianness!!! something affected me quite a lot in her blog is.. "It makes me feel..I dunno....tainted I guess..But I cld never hate him..Cos well..You gotta love someone to hate someone..The opposite of love is not hate..But indifference..Even when you do love someone..Try hating the person..Cos in the end..You'll be the one in pain..Take it from me.." haix.. i shall not anihow give pple my add for the blog especially her!!! if not she gonna kill me again.. haax.. copy and paste.. so yax.. sad las..
[Zen] believed today at 7:36 PM
argh!!! some1 help me.. my ears are so red and hot now las.. dunno y.. hahax.. hmmm.. quite shock though when ash gave me her new blog add.. hmmm.. i kinda search it for sometime and got her add last week las.. but not sure if is her blog.. but today she gave me the add then ya is her blog.. but i had the sense that it was las.. hmmm.. sianx.. seems like she had a lot of fun there though.. if she is still with me i dun think she will have such fun las.. haax.. cox she will scared how i feel and stuff.. but oh well hack.. dun think about it las.. haax.. go watch my super ex girlfriend.. hee..
[Zen] believed today at 11:26 PM
haix.. watched the show devil wear prada.. dunno lehx.. it tot me something that is veri valuable and that is pple change when they are in new environment.. they tend to say that oh i have no choice but actuallii everi1 has a choice.. it is whether or not they wan to take it.. mayb sometimes they are unaware or even jux do not even take to account the choice becox it will affect them so much that they dun even think about the choice.. hmmm.. so ya los.. dunno las.. it jux makes me sad when you see this kind of things happen.. even happened to myself when i was with ashley los.. hahax.. thats y.. she changed in the new environment.. she had the choice to change also mahx.. me here also changed a lot.. is like going in diff directions le.. haax.. im still praying for her everyday.. hope she is happy.. or like lord give her this day that she will not be sad.. haax.. jux misses her bahx.. is no more like love love that kind le.. haax.. btw ran 21.1km in 2hr plus abit.. not bad las.. hit my aim.. haax.. got a medal too.. that you completed.. hahax.. quite an interesting run.. is like running on the ecp bridge so early in the morn and stuff.. things that you will never do ever.. hmmm.. kinda long run actualli.. seeing the finishing line was such a relief las.. is like finally.. its over!!! hahax.. 3 days off till weds night.. thats good.. hahax.. never tot it will end off quite well.. luckily my friend pushed me all the way las.. if not also cannot meet that timing.. owe him one liao.. hahax.. bored.. still feeling sad over that show thing.. she even gave up her love 1 las.. cox she was this big company's boss assistant who is running a fashion magazine firm.. she changed after working there.. hmmm.. realli sadx las.. in the end they also not together but she realised that she changed and told his ex bf that she was sorri los.. haax.. things may jux end up back to square one once you moved a wrong step in life.. haixx..
[Zen] believed today at 4:50 PM
hmmm.. dunno lehx.. kinda worried about how she is doing.. her nick was " im the girl who your mother warned" wierd ar.. hmmm.. also dunno las.. haix.. quite pathetic ar.. i onli can see her nick to think about how she feels and stuff.. see the song she listen to and see her mood.. lolx.. sianx.. gotta book in liao.. nitex all.. to myself too.. haax..
[Zen] believed today at 7:29 PM
hmmm.. is near 10 le.. and that girl still haven sms me yet.. wierd.. wait for her to sms los.. haax.. today quite sad wor.. my small grandma fell and sent to hospital.. she dislocated her finger and fracture her hip bone there.. causing the left leg not able to move.. hmmm.. quite sad ar.. tml is her operation for the hipbone.. hope it goes well and she can walk normally again los.. haix.. jux now she stroke and hold my hand while talking to me.. haax.. can feel the amount of care and concern she gave me las.. although my mum is not her real daughter, she still treat her and us like her own daughter and grandson respectively.. hmmm.. she ate with my family and ash a few times las.. then jux now i msg ash and she still remember las.. she say the skinny and veri nice one ar.. hahax.. she still ask me to send her wishes.. hmmm.. not bad las.. at least she replied me.. haax.. ytd i booked in to pei my friend las.. then we talked quite a lot.. haax.. talked about my acceptance of lesbians and rejection of gays.. haax.. he asked me.. wad if you find out that your daughter is les.. i say i will tell her that it is not veri rite las.. but im not stopping you and its her choice.. then he ask wad if you have a son and he is gay.. hahax.. i said think i cant take it las.. lolx.. quite wierd ar.. realli cant take gays.. distant friend still okie las but close ones.. nonono.. hahax.. then later he also mentioned things tt have me thinking las.. like pple will nvr forget the first person you are sexually intimate with.. is never forget.. quite true ar.. who will forget their first.. hahax.. im not like having more confidence to have ash back in the future or anything.. tiaox.. but is like ya jux merely a truth los.. hmmm.. until now i still think we are impossible las.. how can get back together de.. hahax.. its so far apart le.. her mind thinks diff and stuff.. i think i changed too.. you know is like boats sailing in diff directions.. haax.. jux leave it to fate las.. who i'll meet and wad will happen in the future.. hmmm.. but still constantly miss her las.. thats normal wad.. haax.. studied a bit today.. realli quite a bit onli.. hahax.. must buck up.. reading my purpose divine book again.. lost my way in life.. haix.. hope my grandma is well tml los.. hmmm..
[Zen] believed today at 10:00 PM
hmmm.. another week passed.. i calculated liao.. another erm 60 weeks more i will ORD ORDORDORDORD~~~!@!@!@! wahahahax.. that means 60 more book outs los.. not a lot ritex.. haax.. its like next yr 5 nov.. my parents planning my sis 21 bday le.. her bday is 1 day after mine las.. then they ask me wan to celebrate my bday with her.. actualli ar.. i dun fancy bday de.. so wad if you are born on that day.. lolx.. haax.. think ORD date should be celebrated cox it means you have served this stupid country and can get outta here.. muahahaax.. also dunno wad they planning las.. i jux go and celebrate for my sis can liao las.. i dun wan anithing special.. haax.. hmmm.. next next week is grading for njd.. haax.. going to get higher belt le.. and then the grandmaster of njd gonna teach us shaolin qigong.. hmmm.. dunno wad he is gonna teach also las.. but is a one day thing.. so ya.. haax.. seems so funni to learn qigong.. can i fly after that?? haax.. this few weeks i have been taking over the class in tamp cc las.. then that stupid gab ytd asked me to go and teach the new girls.. o0o0o0 tiaox ritex.. i also not good with girls de.. haax.. they all from mjc de somemore.. hahax.. last week a said about the girl call ashley who joined njd too.. ya tot her ytd also los.. she came alone and has been veri quiet too.. hmmm.. think she should talk more to the other girls los.. if not veri sianx de.. haax.. tot she wun turn out ytd le.. cox she have the veri sianx look los.. hahax.. ehx.. later i gonna book in las.. to pei my friend.. he kenna confined.. i so good ritex.. still going to buy him supper los.. haax.. then mon is cohesion day and i took off on tues!!!! OFFFFFFFF!!!!!! hahax.. but i got no more off liao.. argh.. sadx.. also dunno if they will post me to be a temp clerk or something or not.. haax.. its for my face to recover first.. you know ar.. pple who are posted to be clerk ar every1 will say they chao geng and stuff.. but all my friends are like okie okie with me going over lehx.. haax.. think i have good relations.. haax.. i veri garang de las b4 my face realli got worse.. i chiong everything and do things well los.. try my best too los.. haax.. so mayb thats the reason bahx.. hmmm.. took out all the cds that ashley left me b4 she left.. some she rushed and burn for me los.. cox army can onli bring in cd player.. haax.. she scared i bored.. so caring ritex.. haax.. will nvr forget the day when i reach home after field camp when she left a lot of things on my table b4 she left for aus las.. haax.. teared los and called her too.. haax.. my laptop got the stickers that she pasted and got her pic pasted also.. haax.. i nvr take them out las.. haax.. i stick my cbr (chemical biological radiological) badge too.. haax.. this laptop realli is veri customised to moi.. haax.. so funni las.. my dad brought my laptop to work then got ashley photo there.. then his friends ask if that pic is her daughter.. wahahaha.. then he say god daughter.. tiaox.. so off los.. haax.. okie las.. going to go back camp soon las.. sianx.. stay at home also dunno wad to do.. haax.. update tml bahx.. byeeee peeeeeeeppppxxx...
[Zen] believed today at 4:43 PM
Saturday, August 12, 2006
hmmm.. kinda feeling wierd now.. coxxx... there is a new ashley in ninjado.. she has the attitude as her.. i guess.. i still remember the sight of her with jun jun and fang lu when they first joined ninjado.. she dragged fang lu and jun jun to join with her.. and all of us are all new.. thats y we mixed more.. thennnn.. we got together los.. haax.. actualli is cox of her and another guy who realli made me think that i like her.. haax.. she like got together with this guy for like a week?? she always complained to me about that guy and we got even closer and then got together eventually.. haax.. wierd ritex.. o0 but ya its like that.. looking at ashley's pic now think she is getting prettier by the day.. haax.. last time she wear shorts or jeans onli.. now she wears spag with leather jacket.. skirt? low cut jeans? haax.. think i gave her the dress sense.. wahahaha :D she always buy clothes that i like and tell her wad i like her to wear.. thats y now so chio.. knows how to present herself like a girl and stuff.. now i dunno but the ash that i once knew is realli a good girl.. haax.. okie las.. dun talk about her liao las.. jux let it be los.. haax.. the reason for me to go aus must onli be there to study and nothing else bahx.. hope i can fulfill that.. cant realli say im 100% ready now.. haax.. try my best los.. hmmm.. tml got driving.. luckily i check my calander if not i will miss that lesson liao.. phew.. i booked 15 lessons in total for driving already.. think is more than enough.. but the tester wun give pple pass if you take too little lessons los.. so ya.. waste money.. wow i spent 1150 bucks on driving.. o0 thats quite a lot.. and my mum gave me 300 bucks like tt.. that means i came out 800 bucks.. lolx.. i dun realli feel that i spent so much.. hahax.. lalalala.. waiting for the day i leave sing for aus le.. waiting for a new life.. the reborn me.. haax.. sounds so cheezy.. oh well.. ciaox..
[Zen] believed today at 10:39 PM
wow.. seems like some time i did not blog le.. haax.. today did 4 test routes leh.. haax.. onli 2 got perfect score.. not badx le las.. but still can improve so that can 1 time pass the stupid tp test.. when i do all the redundant checks, in my mind i already planned next time im not gonna do them le.. haax.. d: sianx.. next week long week again.. argh.. got operation dragon warrior.. sounds cool eh.. oh well its still the same stuff that we are gonna do so it doesnt make much diff.. after driving today, i went for supper with my parents at my favorate char kuay tiao stall called 928 in bedok.. its not bad las but jux oily los.. then had a stroll with them too.. finally im able to open up to tell them y we broke up.. haax.. feels much better las.. if not my father will always ask me to forget her las.. still got a lot of girls.. then he will think of some names and say they so chio, go after them.. -_-" so tiaox.. hmm.. then now both my parents kinda accept the fact im going to aus and encourage me liao.. haax.. these stuff takes time to digest i guess.. haax.. tml gonna go esplanade and study chem.. yeahx.. find it so fun las.. especially when there is no stress of exams and pple pushing you to study.. read at your own pace.. :D nitex to myself.. haax..
[Zen] believed today at 1:03 AM
Saturday, August 05, 2006
hahax.. im back again.. with a bad knee and calf though.. hahax.. ran a lot these few days.. argh.. like running but not too long distances.. haax.. today is si hua's award recieving day and her parents did not turn up.. is quite appaulling to me cox most parents are happy to see their child achieve something in life.. dun really get wad the older generations had taught them.. hmmm.. she is your own creation, your own flesh and blood.. something that you are veri proud of and they dun treasure it.. haix.. life is kidda contradicting man.. haax.. but of all sad stuff, we went to eat steamboat today.. think is one of the best steamboat i ever had las.. cox most of the time with other pple it jux dun seem as enjoyable.. kidda boring at times too.. haax.. hahax.. we all cook and eat but think she cook most of the time las since she likes cooking so much.. d: but still ya not badx.. she is a nice girl.. should deserve a good 'environment' to be in and have a good guy too.. hahax.. sianx.. later i gotta drive for more than 3 hours.. hope i get good instructors los.. if not realli going to sian diao.. haax.. sianx now.. hmmm.. hope everything goes well for every1 las.. haax..
[Zen] believed today at 12:52 AM
